Audio: T’was The Night Before A Very Culinary Christmas 2011

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by Amy Flanigan on December 22, 2011 · 13 comments

Did you listen to Paul’s rendition of this classic poem from last year? Well, he’s baaack. Here he is recapping our 2011.

Click on the audio link and enjoy. (Or if you prefer to read – and miss out on his soothing voice – the text follows.)

Merry Merry Holidays to you all!

Twas The Night 2011

Twas the night before Christmas, two thousand eleven
The house redolent, an aroma from heaven.
The candles were lit, throwing a soft warm glow
Upon a memory of a home hosting a feasting show.

It had been a great year, for family and food.
For Amy and doggies, hubby and brood.
Amy got to meet some chefs renown
Like Martha, Marcus, and Nancy, downtown.

We moved into a new house with room for more
Bedrooms, living rooms, and a larger pantry to store
All the ingredients Amy could use in her giant new kitchen.
The meals that she cooked every night were, in fact, bitchin.

The house was complete, but for one big need.
A utensil in which space constraints would be freed.
It was put in the garage, to be used now and later
She got a second refrigerator.

Nana came up the day before the big meal
Because her holiday started before the sun would reveal.
She needed her sleep, the next day busy as a beehive,
With cooking, and more cooking, before everyone would arrive.

Amy as well started her cooking the day prior
making pies and pastries, food stacking higher.
The kids were on stools, engaging in quality control
By asking mommy repeatedly, “Can we lick the bowl?”

Amy surfed the web and poured through pages
Finding recipes both new and from the dark ages.
She wanted a meal that would more often than not
Be remembered well beyond the presents we got.

The oven started heating
The stove started flaming
The kitchen reached 110 degrees
Amy accepting no blaming.

The juices from the meat
Commenced a welcome bubble and sizzle.
I sarcastically asked Amy if she thought it would taste good.
Amy happily replied, “Fo shizzle.”

Raw things went in, cooked things came out
Anticipation of a taste bud festival, no doubt.
Dirty utensils gobbled up valuable counter real estate.
Amy gave Paul a seductive gaze and said, “Your cleaning duty awaits.”

The entire family appeared as if on cue.
Ready to dine, drink, and be merry too.
Upon seeing a landscape of food for the repast,
They made a dash for the dining room table. Fast.

The music in the background full of holiday folly.
Of cheer, and merriment, and bellies grown jolly.
Smiles and laughter, eyes both big and winking.
Mixed with glasses and dishware dinging and clinking.

As some finished the main course, and settled back in their seat.
Amy noted the meal was far from complete.
The final round? A cornucopia of pastries and pies.
Desserts of all sizes met everyone’s eyes.

The company outstanding, the dinner splendid
Coffee and tea signaled another amazing meal ended
At this very moment, Amy made it quite clear.
The conversation concerned the menu for next year.

Another year had come, 2012 after the break.
New recipes to cook, new blog photos to take
And even dinner a little late would still hit the spot.
Because Amy had to get the perfect shot.

The family now gone, children off to bed.
An amazing year still dancing in our head.
Amy smooched me under the mistletoe and holiday light
And said, “Happy Christmukah to all, and to all a good night.”


Leave a Comment

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Stephanie January 4, 2012 at 9:42 am



Melissa December 23, 2011 at 7:32 am

“The meals that she cooked every night were, in fact, bitchin.”

*Spews coffee*

Love this.


Amy December 23, 2011 at 2:54 pm

I know. I, of course, giggled all the way through it. He doesn’t share it with me until he’s done, so… clever clever guy.


Joanne December 22, 2011 at 6:20 pm

Paul, you should have been a poet. and at least now we know how you wooed Amy with all this slick rhymes. Fo. Shizzle.


Jay December 22, 2011 at 3:42 pm

Very clever as always! This must be the first time in history that the words “redolent” and “bitchin” have been used in the same article.


Jen December 22, 2011 at 1:58 pm

Yeaaaa Paulie!


Sandi December 22, 2011 at 1:21 pm

Love it!! Paul’s missed his calling…


Dad December 22, 2011 at 10:33 am

Roses are red, violets are blue, and not a darn thing rhymes with kitchen except what Paul left out.

Clever and creative as usual.


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